Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Rob-isms

The AWESOME-NESS of a 5-year-old boy names Rob: 

1.
ROB: "Mama, can you fix the TV?" 
ME: "What wrong with it?" 
ROB: "It's all fire dogs." 
ME: "What?"
ROB: "Mom. It. Is. All. Fire. Dogs." (he says in his uber condescending 5 year old voice)

I walk in & see this: 

Get it? Black & White spots like dalmatians. 

2.
ROB: "I wish we were rich, mom." 
ME: "Why is that, buddy?" 
ROB: "So all the robbers would look at us & go, 'WHAT?!?'."
ME: "Really?" 
ROB: "Yeah, & then they would write 'S's on their eyes." 
ME:  ***stares blankly***
ROB:  ***stares back at me***

ME: "Oh, like $ on their eyes."

3.
ROB: "Hey, mom do you see this?"
He shows me this (a slinky with Egyptian figures hanging at the end) :
 ROB: "Is it a 'Slinky Ride' OR is it a 'Spiral to the Past'?"  
(Okay, so this one you'd kind of have to hear his voice. But the term "Spiral to the Past" was said in an ominous voice & if you think about how they visually show people traveling to the past it's like they travel through a spiral tube, so I TOTALLY get where he's going with this one.)

4.
ME: "Rob, please go brush your teeth." 
ROB: "But I don't wanna."
ME: "What? Why?"
ROB: "Because I want them to get yellow so I can look like a pirate."
Umm... ewww....


5. 
Here's from his "All About Me" notebook:
When he grows up he wants big muscle-y arms so he can be a wrestler. Which is apparently his profession of choice this week. Just look at those meaty shoulders.

18 comments:

Monica @ All Things Lovely said...

hahha. so great.

Eva Lavelle said...

So precious!

Carolyn said...

One creative child....and a creative mom who can interpret him!! Keep up the good work!!

M said...

Ha ha I love it! Little kids say the funniest things when they aren't even trying to.

hotpants™ said...

I was all.. What does he mean by fire dogs? I get it now.

Ashley said...

Oh man, he is a hoot. I think our 5 year olds need to hang out!

Marlena said...

rob is hilarious!! :)

Treble Clef ♪ said...

My Court loves to collect children's conversations and quotes. She will love this:) "Kids say the darndest things" for sure.

Kristal said...

Love it! 'Spiral to the past' pure awesomeness

Jill said...

Ha! He is at that developmental stage where there is no body in his drawing. You watch - in just a couple of weeks or months he will add the belly/body. He's a cutie!

Em and Russ said...

I'm gonna call the black and white fuzz "fire dogs" from now on. It just makes sense, like "going crispy eggs."

Smithy said...

these are my favorite posts!

Katie said...

You are right - total awesomeness. Every part of this post made me laugh out loud.

Anelieze said...

HaHaHaHa!

April Carter said...

What a great imagination and mind! He is brillant...and so funny. Miss them all .

Coryn said...

Haha! I love this post! I was cracking up while I was reading it.

Esther Noelle said...

FIRE DOGS??????!!!! Seriously! That is soooo cute! Oh man! Love that guy!

Kris said...

hahaha... Rob is one of a kind for sure. And Logan's profession of the week is to be a Costco Receipt checker. So, maybe Rob could be a body guard at Costco while Logan checks all the receipts. I can see this working.